Category Archives: Things that smell

Destination: Destination.

I’ve found a human writing trampoline who, for the extraordinary price of frustratingly average lunches, lets me bounce ideas off him. He listens and asks questions as I talk through plot points, characters, themes, and other various stumble-grumbles quick to launch themselves over baskets of fries. It is a purely artistic process, one unconcerned with anything other than ideas and the golden threads that hold them together.

Over a recent mediocre salad, I bemoaned to him, “I’ve got everything else. I don’t know how the book ends.” In other words, I’m wandering around this process without a clear destination. Great for Passover and Hobbits, not so great otherwise. (*Raises a glass of wine or four to the Hobbitses among us as they groom their feet for the day’s travel.*)

Ultimately this is why, an obscenely long time after a first draft has been written, dismantled, and reworked into multiple drafts, I’m not done.

There are only so many times you can fiddle with the dials until you have to land the plane. (Although you can write unlimited mediocre analogies involving travel.)

Continue reading Destination: Destination.

Nice People and Bags of Hate

I have one of those faces.

It stretches and moves and sometimes lets everyone know exactly what I’m thinking.

But sometimes it makes people think I’m upset when I’m just thinking about tacos. Tacos do not make me upset.

My face does stuff is what I’m saying, although it’d be super if folks mixed things up and focused on my cankles.

Continue reading Nice People and Bags of Hate

If Hallmark Made Hanukkah Holiday Movies Starring Adam Sandler NIGHT 1

KATZ, THE MUSICAL

Gingerbread-scented high school drama teacher Krissy Moss (Drew Barrymore) wants to make the annual Christmas musical more inclusive but has no idea where to start…

Continue reading If Hallmark Made Hanukkah Holiday Movies Starring Adam Sandler NIGHT 1